Willingness

What someone is willing to do, he will do.  If he can't do anything about his situation that is one thing, but if he can, he has to be willing to make changes.  Being willing is voluntary and is a choice.  For example, a person may not be able to do anything about his heart condition on one hand, but on the other hand, there may be things that could be done like exercising and and eating nutritional meals.  However, even if diet and exercise would help the person's condition, he may not choose to do those things.  If one is willing, and a necessary change is made without resistance, all goes well.   However, if someone is not willing to accept his circumstances or the people, places and things involved, there many be some suffering.  Or, in in the previous example, the person's health may suffer.  The more a situation that needs to be accepted is resisted, the harder it becomes to accept and a vicious cycle begins.  You have heard the expression, "go with the flow."  When a person is wiling to accept his or her circumstances, there is usually little or no suffering.  Since willingness is a conscious choice, when adversity hits, the best thing one can do is what he feels is the right thing to do and he wants to do, and then hope that it is in line with what others are doing or want done.  When a someone is willing and accepting, he or she is comfortable with the way things are. He is willing to accept "life on life's terms," and go with the flow.  When this happens life becomes more comfortable and joyful.  We hear about God's will, but at the same time we are told we have free will.  There is that matter of voluntary choice.

Encouragement

Why do we encourage someone?   Well, because, it makes us feel good to be supportive and help another person's morale.  In turn, the person who is encouraged is stimulated to continue to do what they are doing, or what they have said they would like to do.  We all like to be recognized, given feedback, and feel our goals and actions are approved of.  To encourage someone, in the fullest sense of the word, is to inspire them, to give them hope and reassurance that what they are trying to accomplish is something of value, whether it be writing a book, or supporting a worthwhile cause.  Words of encouragement give a sense of confidence, usefulness, and purpose.  When someone is afraid, a word of encouragement can help them overcome obstacles.  Also, to be a better person, or even to have better habits, can result from encouragement.  For example, parents encourage their children to be honest law abiding citizens, good students, and to be kind to not only other people, but to themselves.  Encouraging is always a good thing as it is an expression of positive, good thoughts.  The mere act of encouragement can lead to invigoration and can be given for many reasons.  However, it may be especially welcomed if a project or circumstance is difficult. Sometimes a word of praise and encouragement will make or break an achievement.

Priorities

Priorities can be tangible or intangible.   The Latin word for tangible is "to touch."  Something tangible has physical substance and is real and concrete.  Whereas intangible means immaterial, elusive, and more spiritual in nature.  It's meaning can be grasped, but it cannot be embraced or perceived by our five senses.  The intangible are more abstract and relate to our thoughts, emotions, feelings, characteristics, and values.  The things that cannot be taken away, only given, or as a result of being.  If you are materialistic you have proof that something exists and can be possessed, but by their very nature, they can be lost or taken away.  Happiness is an example of something intangible.  If someone says they are happy, the feeling that they have can only be taken on faith to be true by someone else's sixth sense. A new car, however, can be seen, touched, and heard.  What you have as priorities are those things that come before anything else. Your priorities are the things you think are most important and what you think about, strive for, and act in alignment with. If you are interested in having "things" you will obtain them first.  On the other hand, if it means the most to you to be a good human being, you will become kind, generous, and humble to name a few intangible qualities.  Granted, it is important to have food, clothes, and shelter, and to be comfortable on earth, but if you want to leave something of significance to the world you will not be interested in possessing a lot of material and tangible things.

Charisma

Charismatic people have a way of attracting and influencing others because of their magnetism, personal appeal, and charm.  We feel drawn to them and they become popular.  Sometimes it is thought that having charisma is reserved for powerful personalities such as politicians, theologians, and movie stars, but, in reality, charismatic people are everywhere.  Sometimes we sense something different, confident, and exciting about a person, but not quite understand why we are attracted to them.  It is true, there is an element of glamour that is associated with charisma, qualities of being fascinating and alluring in combination with being attractive and charming.  But not necessarily so.  It is more the charismatic person's presence and the audience they command.  Usually it is movie stars who are associated with glamorous, exciting lives, almost unreal and magical in nature.  Their lives have a certain personal appeal.  Most of our heroes and leaders have magnetic, charismatic personalities, by the nature of their positions, who they are, and their forbearance.    Paul Zweig said, "By hero, we tend to mean a heightened man who, more than other men, possess qualities of courage, loyalty, resourcefulness, charisma, and above all selfishness."  But wherever and whoever they are, a charismatic person's influence goes far beyond what they do, far beyond their personality.  Their mere presence, simple or glamorous, natural and unassuming or flamboyant, has a transformational effect on whomever they come in contact with.  

Kindness is Special Quality

When you hear the words, "I was treated in a kindly manner," or "She was kind to me," what do you think of?  If you are like me, you envision a thoughtful and kindhearted person who is caring and considerate.  This person may also be helpful and sympathetic.  A kind person is unselfish, has a concern for others, and may be habitually kind naturally having a benevolent disposition.  Or, a kindness can be through specific words said or a kind behavior.  I read somewhere recently that if you are about to say something about another person ask yourself:  Is it true?  Is it inspiring? Is it necessary?  Is it kind?"  Mother Teresa and Helen Keller both say the same thing when they write about (us) not being able to do great things, only small things with great love.  And that would mean with great kindness because, always, when a person or animal is loved the one(s) who love them treat them in a kindly manner.  Then remember Flower in Bambi (or is it Thumper?) who said, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."  Sometimes it is hard to react with kindness and tolerance to a potential conflict, but saying "you may be right," may often be the kindest and smartest thing to do.  When I think of kindness, I think of kind eyes, that if recognized, can cause great comfort.  If you have kind people in your life, or even kind animals, be grateful for them and "appreciate" them.

Appreciation is Just That

The word appreciation can be used basically in two ways:  first, the appreciation and admiration of something for its value and what it gives to life, such as art work.  Secondly, appreciation in the sense that something is understood or comprehended e.g., she appreciated the time it took to paint the painting.  Observing color and shape and then being able to paint them on a flat surface with a three dimensional effect.  Appreciation can be natural, sensitive, and insightful, or a learned appreciation sometimes including judgments.  In college I took a class entitled, "Art Appreciation." And it was just that, an appreciation of what we saw, what stirred our souls, and what we liked and acknowledged as "art."  Appreciation can be for people, places, and things, and often compliments are given when someone is appreciative, and then, in turn, the compliment is appreciated.  There can be appreciation and comprehension at the same time.  A piece of jewelry, which is not only admired, but the process of making it and the workmanship involved is understood.   On the other hand, there can be appreciation and admiration without understanding, such as loving Vincent Van Gogh's "Starry Night," but not knowing what the painting is about or what it means ("Starry Night," has an involved story).  The epitome of appreciation is a sense of delight and wonderment shared by others.  Relative to gratitude, when a person is grateful to someone and gives thanks, they appreciate what has been done or said.  In other words, they are in appreciation.

Growth

In my blog of January 29th (Human Beings and Flowers), I wrote that, for me, it is painful to prune my flowers because it is almost as if I am being pruned as well.  I noted, as an analogy, that is true.  It can be said that when we go through periods of renewal and dormancy, our trials and tribulations prune us for further growth.  Our trials and tribulations are like good soil, water, and fertilizer is to plants.  People grow and evolve, evolution being the process by which something gradually changes to different, and more mature, stages in our lives. Like the bud on a rose bush opening, in our personal growth, mentally and emotionally we are expanding. Unlike the natural evolution of flowers, with us it usually takes hard work and often surrender to the powers that be, but with time we do grow.  I have been watching the rose bush that I pruned.  I didn't think it would make it this time and bloom again because it looked so forlorn, just  bare branches looking  like dead ends. But low and behold, today, I noticed small red leaves growing out from those bare branches, among the thorns, despite the thorns.  This is what happens in our lives.  Just when we feel like we will be in the same sad place forever and never "see the light," there is a spurt of growth,  or even an avalanche.  An unknown author said, "May my teaching drop like rain, my speech condense like dew; like gentle rain on the grass, like showers on new growth."  We need to trust the cycles of dormancy will renew us and lead us to new and better circumstances.  We need to be patient, and it wouldn't hurt to remember we are works in progress.