Trustworthiness

Trust is a process over which we have some control.  We don't have to form trusting relationships any faster than we are ready, or with anyone we don't wish to allow into our confidence.  We may have had trouble trusting because of past experiences when we have suffered from broken promises and broken hearts.  We may have been disappointed with people who have proven themselves untrustworthy and consistently been unreliable and undependable.  Because of these experiences we may have learned to stay silent, stuff feelings, and not stand up for ourselves.  In time, hopefully, we find that we can gradually begin to trust people again based on the slow revealing of ourselves with others and observing their responses to our self disclosure.  In some cases, trusting has come easier and we have felt safe and not shied away from trusting, but either way, the first step in a trusting relationship is to be trustworthy ourselves.  In order to trust someone and confide our intimate feelings and thoughts with them, it is important to feel safe and comfortable, and that the person be worthy of our respect and be tolerant and accepting.  We also have to trust ourselves, our decisions and our judgments.  Trusting ourselves can be as minor as knowing we turned off the stove when we left the house, to having faith we will be able to say and do the right thing when called upon to be a trusting friend and confidant, for it is important to let others trust us too.  Trusting may be of the abstract as well as in a relationship.    Richard Carlson, Ph.D., writes in his book, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, "Trusting your intuitive heart means listening to and trusting that quiet inner voice that knows what it is you need to do, what actions need to be taken, or changes need to be made in your life."  Shakti Gawain works with individuals to develop greater awareness, balance, and wholeness in their lives.  She has this to say about trust: " When I am trusting and being myself as fully as possible, everything in my life reflects this by falling into place easily, often miraculously."  And, to quote Steve Jobs, "...so you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.  You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.  This approach has never let me down, and it  has made all the difference in my life."  Trust is a trait or feature of a person's personal nature.