Forgiveness

There are a few kinds of forgiveness:  when we forgive someone, when someone forgives us, and when we forgive ourselves.  Forgiveness is a gradual process, but the reward is great because it makes us feel  surprisingly free.   Forgiving is a gradual process, it isn't easy to "turn the other cheek."   When we forgive another person it doesn't necessarily  mean we forget our hurt and anger, but we are able to let it be and move on.  The best kind of forgiveness is in our hearts and souls.   If someone has done harm to us, we need to forgive them with grace, compassion, and understanding.  Forgiveness is not accepting unacceptable behavior.  We ask for forgiveness because we recognize that we may have harmed others and want to make things better.  Asking for forgiveness of a person who we may have harmed, even unintentionally, takes courage.  There is always the risk of rejection. Besides forgiving others and asking for forgiveness, we also must learn to forgive ourselves for our own sake. We must sweep away and forgive what clutters our hearts and minds because what we hold in our hearts creates the space we live in and share with others.  We need to ask forgiveness so things will be set right and we can be free of any guilt or shame we have been carrying.  Two very important prayers explain the benefits of forgiveness in the very best ways:  First of all, "Forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us" from the Lord's Prayer, and secondly in the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi which starts with "Lord, make me and instrument of your peace." - "it is in forgiving that we are forgiven."  The goal is to find peace in our lives with others.  Life is too short to dwell on the past and other's opinions of us, or actions toward us, or of our opinions and actions toward others.